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06-04-2001 @ 10:15 p.m.
Headaches and Dilemmas

My chemistry test was great. I felt like I knew the answers to every question. I love taking tests like that. It was almost fun. No, correct that--it *was* fun.

I have a very bad headache right now. I'm sure that a large part of it is due to looking into a microscope for hours today studying for tomorrow's test. This is a bad one--I've had it for several hours now and it shows no sign of abating. I think I'm going to have a bowl of cereal and then go lay down. I've taken 2 ibuprofen but I may need more than that.

My headache may be coming, in part, from my career frustration. I don't know what to do and I'm tired of waiting and I don't want to go to school forever. At the very least, to be an NP or CNM, I'd have to go to school for 4 more years after taking a year off which means that I can't get to the business of being what I want for 5 more years. I'm just not sure I'm willing to wait that long. I'm wearying of this whole thing. I could teach English or writing--I'd be done with school in 3 years at the most. But with a Master's degree, I'd only be able to teach at a community college and get paid between nothing. Well, the range for the one job I saw was $35K to $65K. I'm thinking that $65K is exceedingly rare. Now this salary isn't bad if I'm not the primary breadwinner but if Ed wants to go back to school, it would be very difficult on that salary. But he says as much as he'd like to go back to school, he isn't counting on it and I shouldn't make my career decisions based on that. Now he tells me.

I can't think about this anymore. I've got to get rid of this nasty headache.

I'll write again tomorrow. I'm sure by then I'll have it all figured out. Not.

--L

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